Dinner at our favorite Mexican restaurant . It's been a long while since we've gone out. Drinks were still strong, diners were fewer, food was better than ever. It felt good to be out! Afterwards, instead of jumping on the interstate we wound our way through downtown which was extremely quiet. One side street had concrete barrier and rubble blocking the way. Stores and restaurants boarded up. Prepping for the coming week I guess. We continued through other towns, noting how many Christmas lights were still up in neighborhoods. People trying to retain some glitter in their days.
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What you enjoy doing doesn't have to be your career. Your talents don't have to produce anything except the joy in the doing. If you want to write, write. If you want to draw, draw. I want to write and illustrate a childrens book. That does not mean I have to publish it, though my intention lies in that direction. I want to write a memoir and that I don't feel compelled to get published. At least not at this juncture.
I bought books to learn cartooning and animation to develop drawing skills that will bring my characters to life. I set a goal for myself to draw one thing everyday. I look forward to sitting in the evening and drawing while we watch (I listen) tv. I expect a tremendous amount of bad work before good comes through. I still bounce around a lot on technique but putting in the time sets the precedence for routine and routine will bring a balance at some point where I focus attention to an area at a time and my ability to draw will improve. I hit a dead space in writing. Probably because I kept thinking it had to be current subjects of interest to other people. That made me put to much pressure on myself to write at all with the exception of journaling. I'm not a fan of social media. It's too disruptive for me to keep focused on my own work and projects. If I'm going to be disrupted let be by a friend who calls or stops by, or changes in the weather that make me want to grab my camera and go outdoors. Real interaction. This is a decision to author my own life. Fall happily into storytelling. I can take that anywhere, anytime. After a long dry spell of "what the hell should I write about" I was graced with a couple topics. This one just kind of snuck in after a random conversation with my husband. We were enjoying a bourbon and cigar talking about nothing in particular when the conversation turned to posting on social media. I laughed and said "we have all had our missteps there". I went on to mention how some of my better writing seemed to be when I had been drinking but that I should have waited to post until the next day when I could have and most likely would have edited before posting." That was the moment when I shared Hemmingway's quote with him. He suggested instead of going to the media platforms or my blog that I use my office or word documents. I would be writing without next day regrets and deletions. A wise and simple solution. I don't want to give you the idea that I can only write when I drink or that I am always drinking, but there has been some very creative, some very honest writing after a glass of wine or tumbler of bourbon on occasion. I have found validity in the saying that alcohol brings out the truth. Not always in the best way but truths none the less. The other insight I gained from the entire conversation that ensued was that I should worry less about my audience and just write for myself. Whatever shows up.
Woke to snow. Oddly it shifted my perspective and mood. I wanted to jump in the truck, hit 4 wheel drive and go. Technically I did not need 4 wheel drive despite streets not being plowed but it was the spirit of the moment. I went with it. Stores were like ghost towns. My perfect shopping scenario. I scored stocking stuffers, grabbed a Christmas ham, complimented a stranger on his hat (it was a really cool hat). It broke the monotony of gray days. This has been a strange hard year. Nothing is normal. But, we haven't given in, haven't given up. Have you?
AT&T has been laying underground cable in my neighborhood as well as around the city. I won't name the company they have working for them. But there has been a lot of digging in our front yard. Today they were pouring concrete. We lost water pressure. At first as in the past I was just going to ride it out but then I thought, NO, we pay taxes, huge amount of taxes, and we were never apprised of the work. So I called the mayors office who put me through to the planning dept. who of course wasn't available but I left a message. Fifteen minutes later the water company was out here but then I had no water. I went out to talk to the men. They had to turn off our water because the company working for AT&T had damaged a water line. We are really inconvenienced for the next 24 hours . The main point is , I spoke up in a professional, polite , but firm way to rectify the problem. That's the new me. Yeah, I've grown.
Everybody Dance Now
I mean it...get up, get moving Everybody Dance Now Today is your birthday. We miss you but with less tears now. Stories that make us laugh, moments we wish you were here for but I have no doubt that you actually didn't miss any of them. Accomplishments that make each of us stop and say to ourselves, Chad would be proud of me. You're gone from our daily lives yet not gone at all. We love you, we carry something special in ourselves from you that is unique to each and some things collectively as a family. I am happy that you embraced life so fully. I am thankful for the things I learned from you even if it was in hindsight. Love You.
In recent months I have begun cooking with cast iron. A new experience that I am loving. But the pans are expensive. I wanted this large Dutch oven with legs and and hanger because I want to cook over a fire as well as stove top. I had it on my radar and it was somewhat affordable, at least in terms of good cast iron cookware. Suddenly the price increased by over $40 so I put it on my wish list. To my surprise this arrived today!
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AuthorHello, I'm Kim Hitzges. I am a writer, photographer, and mixed media artist who is following the magic that guides my life. Archives
June 2021
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